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Jesus Would NOT Call Me A Piece of Garbage

By Gloria Diaz

Check out Gloria's Blog — Edge of Gloria!

Fort Wayne Reader

2013-08-01


I had a Christian call me a piece of garbage on a website a few weeks ago. I was surprised at how angry he was, but not really. He was upset because I had the nerve to ask him if he had investigated the neighborhood he was moving out of BEFORE he moved in. I mean, don people just buy houses sight unseen these days? And move into a neighborhood they know nothing about?

Anyway, I was surprised, but not surprised. Especially from a so-called Christian. Anyone who self-identifies as a Christian, I always stand back, because I know what's coming. They are Christian, yet they hate poor people, fat people, and certain minorities. Also, they believe so much in the sanctity of marriage, they've had several trips down the aisle. Some of you just had an anyurism reading this, didn't you? Well, I worked for someone like this. They were okay with those of Japanese descent, especially if they had money. Everyone else was to be avoided, except other fellow “Christians.”

But I know when an individual introduces him or herself to me, and says they've been “saved,” “born again,” or similar, I stand there and wait, because the hate will start. It never fails. I once had a born again Christian ask me if Catholics believe in Christ (!). I'm baptized Catholic, but the church has done some evil, evil things. Did you just have another anyurism? I don't boast my Catholicness, because I don't endorse child abuse or taking advantage of young women to make money. (No, it's not prostitution: check out The Magdalene Sisters for a Catholic horror show that lasted well into the 1990s.)

Why is it that so-called Christians act so, well, ANTI-CHRISTIAN? You heard me. Anti. Christian. I see way too many of those, “Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven” bumper stickers and I want to puke all over them. I certainly hope God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, St. Peter, and George Burns can forgive your hatred, name calling, judgmental tendencies and snobbery. I'd rather work with a hundred atheists who do the right thing than with a group of Christians who hate me because I'm fat, poor, a minority, and childless. I never had kids because my reproductive system was screwed up and once I dated a guy who was so poor, he took me to a seance at a cemetary. AND I didn't want to be on welfare, because invariably, the guy would probably leave me and not pay child support (because he was poor.)

So if someone asks me if I've been saved, or if I'm a Christian, I'd have to say no. I don't qualify as a Christian because I don't care if you're gay and want to get married. I don't care if you want to smoke pot. I acknowledge that shit happens, and if you run into some bad luck and you're broke, join the club. I grow extra tomatoes on purpose and donate them to the food bank, in order to give back for the times that I had to go there. If I can spare some change or a buck for someone who's homeless, I do (that's rare, because I hardly ever have cash on me). I try to be courteous. Does that mean this Catholic is Christ Almighty? No. But what WOULD Jesus do?

He wouldn't call me garbage just because I asked him if he investigated his neighborhood before he moved in. But I imagine the Kingdom of Heaven doesn't have crime problems. But I'm hoping the Christians there are of better quality than those here on Earth. Maybe it's time for another flood, eh God?

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