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By Gloria Diaz
Fort Wayne Reader
As I write this, the race for gays to get married continues out in California. A very small percentage of the population is getting hitched, and by the reaction of certain people, youíd think aliens have landed, abducted our children and destroyed our SUVs. Donít we have more important things to worry about? And please, enough with the ďgays are making a mockery of the sanctity of marriage.Ē If marriage is so sacred, how come so many couples divorce? And why isnít anyone discussing this?
Personally, I donít care who gets married as long as there are only two people in the union and both take it seriously. Britney Spears was married for less than half the time of an average menstrual cycle, yet people werenít up in arms about her making a mockery of marriage. They were more concerned that Ms. Spears was ďlosing it.Ē Itís twits like this, and couples who spend more time on the wedding ceremony and reception than on the relationship, who are making a real mockery of marriage. Commitment isnít deciding on which $4,000 wedding dress to get, but deciding how to deal with your spouseís infidelity or drug addiction, if those problems should surface.
Someone I once worked with said that marriage means deciding what you can live with. Makes sense to me. This is not to say people donít change. Like technology, they can, and do. I thought Odyssey was one of the coolest things ever invented. Then Atari 2600 came out and our Odyssey became obsolete. So how can people in their mid-twenties know theyíve met the person they want to spend the rest of their lives with? Okay, comparing people with video games probably isnít the best analogy. But youíre not the same person you were in 1988. And in 20 years, youíll be a different person too. So will your spouse.
Which brings me back to marriage. Start treating it like the life commitment it is. ďíTil death us do partĒ should mean just that. Unless people start taking marriage seriously, arguing about who has the right to get married is pointless. There are gay and straight relationships that have lasted a long time without benefit of marriage. Is it because both partners had the freedom to walk away without a legal hassle? Or do they know something that unsuccessful marriages donít? My theory is these couples met the right person. The rest of us settle for ďMr./Ms. Almost Right, Because If I Donít Grab This One Iíll Die Alone And I Canít Deal With That.Ē
Once people get married, regardless of their sexual orientation, they need to stay married. Period. Time will tell if gay couples have a better success rate than straight couples. Based on our current statistics, something tells me divorce lawyers will be busier than ever. Anyone want to send me to law school? I promise to give you a deal on your next divorce.